Death and Dealing With Grief

At some point in each of our lives we will be faced with the death of a loved one.  Yet, death is still a touchy subject for a lot of people.  Many times when someone dies we don't like to talk about the person.  And quite often I've been where the simple mention of death is totally avoided.  For those who have experienced such a loss, it is important to know that God is still with you and he loves you.

The believer will dwellin God's house forever
John 14:1-4  "Let not your hearts be troubled.  Trust in God; trust also in me.  In my Father's house ar emany rooms; if it were no so, I would have told you.  I am going to prepare a place for you.  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and tak you to be with me that you also may be where I am.  You know the way to the place where I am going."

There will be no mor suffering and sorrow
Rev. 21:1-4  Then I saw a new heaven and new earth, for the first heaven and first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.  I saw the Holy city, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beatifully dressed for her husband.  And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men and he will live with them.  They will be his people and God himself will be with them and be their God.  Hw will wipe away every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

When we are hurting, we should learn to still trust and praise God.  Have faith that he will bring the peace back into your life.

Christ gives peace and rest to all who come to him in faith
Matt. 11:28-30  Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Jesus is the Prince of Peace
Isa. 9:6  He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

God is always leading and protecting us!!!! Read Psalm 23 ( you probably already know it by heart)

God works all things together for our good
Rom. 8:28  We know that all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

For those who have lost a loved one or someone near and dear to them, know that God can fill those voids that you are left with.

2 Cor. 9:8  God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

When grieving the death of a loved one, you may experience several emotions: denial, disbelief, depression, anger, confusion, and guilt just to name a few. 

Coping with death is very important to your mental health.  Here are a few ways to cope effectively with grief:

1. Express your feelings---tell others how you feel to help you work through the grieving process.
2. Seek out caring people---find relatives and friends who can understand your feelings of loss.  Join support groups.
3. Take care of your health---Eat and get plenty of rest.
4. Be patient---It can take months to years to come to terms with your loss.
5. Seek outside help when necessary---if it seems too much to bear, seek professional help

When helping others grieve:

1. Share the sorrow---allow/encourage them to talk about it and share memories.  Listen.  You may also share your own experience with death.
2. Offer practical help---baby-sitting, cooking, running errands.
3. Be patient.
4. Encourage them to seek professional help if you feel they are not coping well with the loss.

Resources/references:
GriefNet.org---an online community support for people dealing with grief, death, and major loss.  This is for kids and adults

Compassionate Friends---National, self help organization for those grieving the loss of a child.  If you enter your city or zip code it will give you the information to the nearest Compassionate Friends location.  The information below is for Wichita, KS:
Sunflower Chapter
Chapter # 1134
Meeting: 1st Thurs. of each month at 7:00PM
Place:  Central Community Church 6100 W. Maple Ste. 217 Wichita, KS 67209

Be Blessed

Alcohol/Drug Abuse

As many of you already know, the world lost yet another great voice last week...Whitney Houston.  I was a great Whitney fan.  My heart goes out to her family and close friends whom will truly miss her just as her fans will.

We've seen Whitney's life play out in front of our lives.  Her becoming a superstar at an early age.  Bringing us hit after hit.  She grew into a beautiful woman who happened to fall in love with another young star, Bobby Brown.  And yes, we saw her demise as she fought her drug addiction.  With many speculations roaming, we still do not know what was the actual cause of her early death.  But I want to get some insight on how God viewed drug and alcohol abuse.  Primarily, the difference between a drug that is prescribed to you and one that is not.  Does God view drug use as sinful if it is prescribed?  For the past several years we have seen several celebrities lose their lives do to an overdose of prescription drugs.  How does this compare to lets say, smoking marijuana.  I will use that drug because it is the least harmful and life threatening amongst a host of other illegal drugs and is the most controversal being that some states are now legalizing the drug and still others are considering to do the same.

Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit
1 Cor. 6:19-20  Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?  You are not your own; you were bought at a price.  Therefore honor God with your body.

Proverbs 20:1  Wine is a mocker and beer a brawler; whoever is led astray by then is not wise.

Heavy drinking brings misery
Proverbs 23:29-35  Who has woe?  Who has sorrow?  Who has needless bruises?  Who has blood shot eyes?  Those who linger over wine, who go to sample bowls of mixed wine.  Do not gaz at wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it goes down smoothly!  In the end it bites like a snake and poisons like a viper.  Your eyes will see strange sights and your mind imagine confusing things.  You will be like one sleeping on the high seas lying on top of the rigging.  "They hit me", you will say, "but I'm not hurt!  They beat me but I don't feel it!  When will I wake up so I can find another drink?"
This gives you a visual picture of what a drunk person looks like

Eph. 5:15-18  Be very careful then, how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, becasue the days are evil.  Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is.  Do not gt drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery.  Instead, be filled with the Spirit.

No drunkard shall enter heaven
1 Cor. 6:9-10  Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdon of God?  Do not be deceived; Neither the sexually immoral...nor drunkards...will inherit the kingdom of God.


The Bible does not directly address any form of illicit drug use.  That's  not to say that recreational drug use is permissible.  There are several very clear biblical principles that place drug us well outside the realm of acceptable behavior. 

Christians are mandated to respect and obey the laws of the land...

Many argue that marijuana does not mandate prohibition since prescription drugs, nicotine and alcohol are legal.  Being that marijuana is being used to treat medical issues and pain: cancer and glacoma patients.  Dutiful submission to authority and patient preseverance through unjust suffering and/or perceived unfairness is God's high standard for us--even if that means abstanining from marijuana in compliance with "unfair" legislation.

Now, that leads me to my confusion.  Does that mean if mairjuana becomes legalized, would it then be ok to use it?  Would that use of the drug be sinful?

In some nations (the Netherlands for example) recreational drug use is legal.  But we as Christians have to remember we are to be a good steward of what God has entrusted in us regardless of our national identity.  This includes our earthly bodies.  And unfortunately illicit drugs destroy your body not just physically but mentally and emotionally.

Titus 2:12  Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and Godly, im this present world.

With all this being said, and from my own studying I ponder on those who unfortunately develop an addiction to prescription drugs.  Many of these drugs are mind altering and harmful to the body as well especially once the person becomes dependent on the drug and abuses it.  Is this any different from smoking marijuana. 

This leaves a lot to think about.  My belief...I stick with... anything that is harmful to the temple of Christ is unacceptable behavior as a Christian.

I hope that my viewers are able to log in and comment to this blog.  I really would love to hear your opinions and thoughts.

Reverent Behavior

Proverbs 31:30 helps define reverent behavior when it sums up the life of the godly woman: "Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord shall be praised".  A woman who fears or reverences the Lord will act accordingly in her daily life.  She is careful with her speech and considers her actions because her love for God hems in her behavior.

1 Timothy 2:9-10 helps explain why...God says, "I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or costly garments, but rather by means of good works, as is proper for making a claim of godliness."

What does this mean?  When we make a claim of godliness (calling ourselves Christians or followers of Jesus Christ) then our lives should line up with our proclamation.  Our reverent behavior authenticates our words that we are followers of Jesus.

Understanding the debt of love and gratitude we ow to our heavenly father helps motivate us to obey and love Him more readily and faithfully.  We will still find it difficult to obey the Lord, but the desire to show our love and gratitude to Him overrides our tendency to rebel.

Reverent behavior begins with a reverent mind.  What we think about something determines  how you respond or act.  So it is essential we think on the right things.

All reverent behavior begins with:
1.  A true love for God
2.  Reading the Word of God
3.  Seeking first the kingdom and His righteousness
4.  Renewal of the mind

The thoughts that lead to reverent behavior comes from mentally marinating ourselves in the things of God and that marinating occurs when we set aside time to read, study, meditate on, or memorize portions of scripture and prayerfully seek to apply what we learn to our lives.

When the Word of God permeates our hearts and minds, our behavior will naturally become reverent.  The more our minds are filled with God, the more our behavior will reflect Him.

Be Blessed

The Wife of Noble Character

As women, we are created to have a positive and profound impact on everyone around us--whether it be our husbands, children, friends, customers, or society in general.  Being a woman is a blessing, and being a wise woman blesses others in ways that can't be calculated.

Late to bed, early to rise

A wife of noble character wears many faces and fills many roles that can change with the seasons of her life.  She draws her strength from the Lord to lay down her life for those she loves.  What is her reward?  Her children adore her.  Her husband cherishes her company, trusts her judgement, and brags about her to all his friends.  She will be remembered long after she's gone.  Not as a woman of beauty and skill but as a woman who sought God first.


As I ponder over the years of just my life, I can count on one hand the number of Godly women I have encountered.  I mean to the point where it doesn't need to be said that they are women of God.  It simply showed through their character.  Nowadays, and since the reality is that most women now are expected to work or need to in order to help contribute to household finances I don't see a lot of women who are willing to put forth the kind of effort for our family and friends that is described in Proverbs 31:10-31.  I'm finding that a lot of younger women tend to steer towards hanging out and having fun instead of doing everything there is to do to make sure their family is taken care of.  And sometimes that may include doing things that you don't feel like doing.  I worked full time, attended college full time, all while raising 3 kids and having a husband.  It's not easy.  And there were plenty of times where I felt like  "ok, I've worked all day too so why do I have to cook dinner (lol)".  But it took me to understand my role as a woman of God, a wife and a mother.  Now don't get me wrong.  Its always nice to have a little help every now and then but I feel like it is our duty to make sure our homes are in order; that our husbands and children have all that they NEED.

I love taking care of my husband and kids.  I love being in the position to give or help someone in need.  I just ask God to continue to help me grow; help me to gain the status of a noble woman.